Ostara Goddess of Joy

Ostara and Eostre are the same goddess from different areas of Europe. She is the goddess of joy and new beginnings celebrated during the Spring Equinox, when all things are equal. Her name lives on in Easter and also estrogen.  Her symbols, rabbits and painted eggs, suggest fertility, celebrated during springtime festivals.

While Ostara represents youth, the maiden, and all the innocence that surrounds being young, this is also an opportunity to point out how important it is to look to elders for guidance during youth. You being a young woman, take it from an old woman, have a lot to learn, but you also have an amazing adventure ahead of you!

Young women today are vulnerable and lack a confidence due to living without the active and present influence of elders.  In the not-so-distant past grandparents were an inclusive part of the nuclear family.  They provided financial assistance for childcare and housing and were recognized for their wisdom.  Their advice was sought after and followed.  Young women grew up hearing of their wisdom in lessons they had learned.  By the time a woman was old enough to leave home and start her own family she was ready.  She also knew she had the support of parents and grandparents and would never be totally on her own.

Today's women don't necessarily leave home to start their own families.  They go to college or work and live on their own. In college they face different ideologies and philosophies that challenge everything they learned at home.  In many cases they are introduced to ideas that they quickly embrace which, down the road may collide with their true values.  Young women today fight, in most cases, the very thought of being like their own mothers, or God forbid, their grandmothers.  Many years later, and after years of hard earned lessons they begin the slow trek back to their roots and discover just how smart and capable their mothers were all along. 

Reminds me of an old saying my mother-in-law often repeated; youth is wasted on the young.  How true.  I grew up hearing my mother's friends declare, "I wouldn't be twenty one again if you paid me!"  In my twenties the first time I heard it I thought it was the stupidest thing I'd ever heard.  Who in their right mind would not want to be twenty-one again?  The energy!  The stamina!  The vitality!  Seriously? Then I hit my thirties and was amazed at how much more validated I felt when I spoke.  I wasn't dismissed like a child being sent to the 'little table' at Thanksgiving.  I was even able to carry on intelligent conversations without someone throwing their hands in the air and exclaiming, "Kids!"  The best was yet to come, but I would have to go through hell to get there.

When I turned forty my life turned inside out.  My marriage dissolved.  My youngest child was killed; murdered at the tender age of twenty-one.  No one, not family or friends, could have predicted all that hit me within months of each other.  I suddenly had no routine to follow.  My eldest son was finishing up college and chose to stay close to his dad, so I was, for the first time in my life, on my own. It was a crazy roller coaster ride and I was in the very first seat for the entire ride!  I had to learn financial responsibility on an income that was never intended to be the sole source of support.  I had to make changes in everything from refinancing a home to opening new bank accounts and moving utility bills into my name.  I had credit card debt that had to be paid off. I underwent surgery and had to deal with medical debt.  Notice I put debt ahead of physical recovery.  This was my forties and it slipped into the fifties before I knew what was happening.

In my fifties I had a momentum going and was able to see that I was a survivor. During my fifties I became debt free and all on a salary that would have defeated a lesser woman. I was healthy, even after another minor surgery, and able to do whatever I set my sights on doing. I had some set backs in employment and ended up, at the end of my fifties, doing exactly what I had always loved doing; working with school children. But this time I would follow the same class from sixth grade to graduation.  So far it's the highlight of my every waking day. They are two years from graduation now and together we navigate life from one hour to the next. We laugh and cry together and most days I just try to make them understand they aren't alone.

In my sixties, now, I experience a freedom that only comes from having survived so much.  I still have an abiding faith in people and enjoy, really enjoy, what I do.  So what is the point of this 'lesson'?  What advice could I impart on women coming up in the world today?  LISTEN TO YOUR ELDERS.  

Wonderful things happen as we age. We become very comfortable in our skin, for the first time in our lives, for many of us. We feel empowered to be bolder and more assertive. We become more sure-footed and comfortable with ourselves. But that comes from living, taking risks, and learning things the hard way that we simply refused to learn from the women around us in our lives. When an older woman talks about experiences she's had, young women need to pay attention.  We no longer sit at the feet of our grandparents and listen to their stories as we ball yarn or snap string beans for dinner. We are spread out from our life connections and in many cases forced to text, Face Time, or Skype to stay in touch. But life lessons need to continue being shared. Speak up.  Ask for advice.When asked for advice, give it.  Relate an experience to drive it home. The burden is on both young and old to come together and embrace what we are experiencing and what we have learned from our experiences.

What our young women face today comes in the form of social connections that challenge their own ideas.  These young women can be argumentative and defensive from having to fight their way through society.  It's not easy to validate someone so angry and exhausted from having to justify everything they say and do....or worse, don't care anymore what anyone thinks or says. These are women who need the love and wisdom of an elder in their lives. These are the women likely to shrug their shoulders and dismiss you.  Don't mistake their insolence for confidence.  These women want someone to hang in there and show them they know a thing or two about life.

Being young never was easy but it's harder and more cautionary today than at any time I remember at that age.  I was head strong and fearless.  I was impulsive and didn't give much thought to consequences.  I was lucky.  People die today for much less than I did at their age.  If ever there was a time young people need to be able to trust and discuss life with an elder, it's now.  Right now.  Our young girls are twisting in the wind and have a rough road ahead of them without benefit of an older and wiser woman taking them by the hand and showing them they understand, not just because they are older, but because they learned valuable lessons the hard way.  Show them love and affection and then without judgement, guide them to being able to make wiser decisions.

It really is a miracle I am still here. My mother married young and had two children before she was twenty one!  She was an awesome home maker, cook, and skilled 'cosmetologist' (beautician).  But she had a mother she leaned heavily on for support. I rejected any help I could have had because I was an independent woman, a feminist, and I didn't need anyone.  Where I got that notion, I have no idea.  The older I got the more I disagreed with the notion that a woman can have it all. No one gets it all. This is a lie.  If you think someone has managed this, I promise you they would not agree. No one makes it alone in this world, and no one gets through this life without making mistakes. This is the truth.  And if we don't start taking an active interest in what our young women are going through, it's only going to get rougher for them. Rather than sit back and talk about them, and how silly they are, how ridiculous they sound, start talking TO them. The earlier the better. It's time the older, wiser, liberated women in society start including our young women at the table of discussions. It's time to validate their feelings and accept their experiences as the stuff to build on rather than dismiss in exasperation.  Our young women want to be recognized and we need to pass on what we've learned to a generation that will do like wise in just a few short years.  Give it up, elders. Embrace the youthful fearlessness of being twenty one and give thanks for being able to say you're 'that old!'.




http://www.goddess-guide.com/ostara.html

Lilith Goddess of Darkness

Lilith, Adam's FIRST wife, was a handful.  Yes, indeed.  She was created, as was Adam, from the dust of the earth, according to legend.  She was not created at the same time, however, and that was the basis of the brew-haha between them from her first breath.  

Adam had already been created and had been given total domain over all the living things God had created before him; he got to name them and he even found himself jealous of their coupling and affection for each other (this was Eden, after all). He tried mating with the females of various animals but felt no deep connection or bond.  So he did what any red blooded male would do when he's not satisfied; he whined to God about feeling rejected and lonely. So, God, wanting everything to go as smoothly as possible, took of the same dust of the earth and made Lilith.  What a looker!  She was curvy AND capable.  Oh, and she liked sex.  Adam was in paradise, literally. And she fit him perfectly and was, he thought, just as he fantasized his perfect mate would be, until she wasn't.

Seems Lilith was also very smart.  She KNEW God had already told Adam he was the boss over all the living things.  And Adam took that to mean he was boss over her, too. He even ordered her to lay beneath him for sex! She wasn't having it.  She was equal to Adam in almost every way; she was equal to Adam in sex appeal and drive. And before long she decided the only area they were not equal was intelligence because he wasn't getting it....she was NOT his slave. She rebelled.  Adam whined.  She ignored him. Adam whined even louder.  She stopped giving him her cookie.  Adam stomped his foot and cried out to God.  

God ordered Lilith back into Adam's arms.  Lilith took off.  God told  her that until she returned to Adam AND submitted to his authority, for every day she refused, one of her children would die. Her motherly instinct did not over ride her hatred of being told what to do, period.  If God had made her to be a belt, she was determined not to buckle under him! The carnage did not move her to submission.  The accounts vary as to where she went but one account has her vacationing near the Red Sea....an area known for the worst of the worst demons, and she got busy. Busy having lilim, that is.  Seems for every child of Adam's that was killed, she popped out a lilim.  She went on to produce 100 of the little suckers. So God struck a deal with her; He put her in charge of newborn children.  And she countered with an agreement that unless they were protected by an amulet bearing the three names of God, she would take their lives.    

Eventually God took a rib from Adam as he slept and created a docile and submissive mate for him and they lived happily ever after, until she shared an apple with him and Adam whined about her being too cute to resist and they were kicked out of Eden.  Life became hard but from the number of children they reportedly added to the planet, doesn't sound like Adam had any trouble getting it up for Eve.

Lilith went on to become the NIGHT TERROR according to Hebrew mythology.  

Okay, so how do I propose to link this with today's busy woman? So many ways to go here.  I could tap into the idea that in any relationship based on respect and equality, there still has to be a measure of submission going on.  Do women want a man totally submissive to them.  I didn't think so.  So that means the other person in this relationship has to acquiesce some of the control. How is this done in harmony?  Someone just accepts the reality that they can be right or they can be happy.  They understand this is in no way taking away from their ability to take control, they just accept that the more important issue for their continued success as partners is the harmony that only happiness can bring. What actually happens in long term relationships, any way is a shifting of roles from time to time.  It can occur out of necessity or through a trial period of time. People together for decades share that over time they just fell into a natural role that worked for the relationship. That's one way to learn from Lilith.

The other interpretation is one of stubbornness, or ego.  Lilith was right to be upset over the degrading set up she was given without benefit of negotiation.  Ordered to be at his beck and call.  Ordered to be on the bottom during sex.  She was as perfect a creation as Adam.  She was created in God's image, as was Adam.  So why all the second class citizen stuff?  To God's credit, He created a mate with spunk and wit and determination.  Adam needed a woman like that because, apparently he was a whiner.  God wanted what any parent wants when disharmony breaks out between offspring.  He wanted peace and quiet.  He wasn't concerned with how this would affect the one he was telling to shut up and stop causing trouble. Had God used more mediation between the two, He, no doubt, could have avoided the mess Lilith created.  But he didn't and with every, 'Lilith, shut up and do as Adam says!' her anger grew and grew to the point she was cutting off her own nose to spite her face. Her reasoning was reduced to a crumb and she wasn't giving in regardless the consequences.  But there are always consequences to our actions.

Lilith cost innocent children their lives.  She created turmoil and unrest that continues today because she went totally off the rails. Did she initially have grounds for her rebellion. Yes.  However, any time our actions cause injury to someone else, we have a bigger debt to pay.  

I guess the lesson I take from Lilith is this; make sure you are operating from an earnest conviction and not just to get your own way.  Intention is everything.  If your intention is just to force someone's hand to bend to you, you might have a bigger debt to pay before it's all said and done. 

Bullying is a trendy word right now and it's used when it has no place in a situation.  If you tell someone the color red is not working for them, this is not an example of bullying, but in so many situations this is how absurd the argument is laid out.  We've reached a place where if someone disagrees with us we feel obligated to call them a bully.  Bullying is serious and it causes long term damage, both physically and emotionally.  

Lilith bordered on being a bully, in my interpretation of the legend. She not only refused to submit, she wasn't phased by the loss of life her rebellion caused.  She wasn't moved to stop until she got her very own title of authority; Night Terror Over the Newborn.  Her 'if I was a belt I wouldn't buckle' attitude ended badly for her and the consequences of her insubordination were life altering for her own children.

How many times do we catch ourselves playing the same game? We see it play out in toddlers going through their 'terrible twos' and in teens driven by hormonal urges to break free of parental authority.  These are dangerous times for both ages because we know now that brains have not developed sufficiently at these ages to be making sound decisions based on hissy fits.  But what excuse does the twenty-something, thirty-something, or forty-something have for decisions based on just wanting the upper hand in a relationship?  Before deciding to take that grand stand for equality make sure the consequences don't involve a cosmic debt that begs for payment in full plus interest, like...tomorrow!

http://gnosis.org/lilith.htm

Pele Goddess of Vitality

Pele, Hawaiian goddess of fire, is best known for being both a destroyer and creator of land. Her lava devours everything in its path and where the lava cools when it reaches the ocean, new land is created.  One of six daughters and seven brothers born to Haumea, earth goddess, and Kane Milohai, creator of heavens and earth, she was a hothead, to say the least.  Her temper and aggression against her sister got her exiled.  Her sister sort of had a right to be nasty toward her, considering Pele had seduced her husband, or so he said.  

Her brother provided her with a good canoe and guided her to an island far away.  Being King of the Sharks, he could do that.  She carried with her, in egg form, her youngest sister, Hi'iaka, patroness of the Hula.  When she arrived at the Hawaiian island, she struck a place deep in the earth, but before she could finish she was attacked by her sister. Their battled raged on until Pele was torn apart. Legend says her bones remain at a hill called Ka-iwi-o-Pele.  

The argument can be made for or against Pele but what can not be denied is Pele propels us into vital action. She is a voice that resonates with passion and confidence. A woman’s will, thought, and mental attributes originate in the solar plexus...that place where deep knowledge of what is right, what is true, and what feeds us resides. 


It's not news to women that men devalue our feelings. When men go off script they are described as creative geniuses, deeply passionate, and devoted to leaving a giant footprint in history.  When women do the same thing, we're called nuts, sluts, whores, and hormonal mental cases. Strong women are judged to be deceptive, manipulative social climbers who need a man to get their leg up in the world.  They claim we are simply the product of our raging hormones. News flash.  We are all slaves to our hormones during our most creative and productive times during life. Both men and women are subject to the highs and lows of hormone production.  My theory is the happiest times in anyone's life are before hormones kick in, birth to eight, and after they've worn themselves down, age sixty to however long it takes to finally transition from physical life. Those times between eight and sixty are where our history is most compelling and worth reading. This is what sustains us in our old age, provides the most tears and laughter, and where our wisdom was molded, the hard way; through experience.  


I believe I am living at a time where women have the most freedom to strive, to conquer, and inhabit what ever passions drive them to break down barriers and walls built by men to keep us contained.  Men initially called it protecting us. We've since learned their true agenda was based on anything but protecting us. Men might finally be learning that women pose no more threat to their manhood by being allowed to grow into ourselves than other men have been to them in the form of creating wars to establish control and power over other men. The only problem we have now is that not all men are created equal, shock and awe, as is demonstrated in the archaic mentality inhabited in misogynous doctrines wrapped around religion that declare women to be nothing more than breeders for men. Once we can get beyond this ideology and in solidarity, take back the power these relics have abused for centuries, I think ALL women in all corners of the world will be able to shine as brightly or as discreetly as they like.  


From motherhood to board rooms, we have some catching up to do with regards to just how much has been stolen from us by men hoping to keep us from the reality that we are deserving of everything they've denied us. So if we sometimes come off as bitches when we're told we can't do what makes us happy, I hope men will cut us some slack and back the hell up.  They haven't done such a bang up job of ruling the world if you judge them by the number of wars and uprising going on around the world.  We've had just as many women working on technology and innovations to make life better, but the credit has been slow in coming.  Please don't be so quick to call us ball busters when we stand up and demand to be heard and seen for what we've been bringing to the table for centuries while men took all the curtain calls.

Pele brings action.  You will not just stand still in her presence and live to tell it. Pele compels us to move.  Passion is loud, it's forceful, it's intense, and it leaves a mark.  That's the whole point.  Be not afraid to feel, to show what you feel, and to inspire others to feel what most makes them feel alive.  This is living. This is what creates the history that will sustain you in old age.  Don't be undermined by this trend that bases wisdom and worth on beauty.  Your worth is not in how long you can hold back a wrinkle.  Your worth is not dependent upon how perky your boobs are through all the changes a woman's body naturally takes as she ages.  We age from the inside out, the same place our true beauty resides.  Live in abundance, from where your passions, your dreams, and your hopes spring to life; your will to be, to laugh, to love.  You think and therefor you are!!! Whether it's to mentor, to coach, or to actually sweat under the spotlights, your passion is calling.

Women need to understand this one principle; we are now what we have always hoped we'd be someday.  The walls around us are coming down.  I'm not saying it's a walk in the park and right there for the taking.  It's never been easy to get every thing you always wanted.  It's work.  It requires relentless faith in yourself.  The kind of faith that has you spending every waking moment preparing for that opportunity when it knocks.  If you can't relate to the idea of losing sleep because you're driven to work on a skill, then you're not operating from your own passion.  Find your own passion.  Find that thing that others call work but you call fun.  When you can't see yourself doing anything else and being totally satisfied, you've found your passion.  Now, run with it and don't let anyone change your mind.  Even if you have to subsidize your dream with some temporary form of work, stay sharp and keep your passion alive in every minute you call your own.  You'll find coincidences in the opportunities that arise to satisfy your need to maintain your passion.  When you look back, one day, you'll see that by keeping your dream alive, all roads led to finding that outlet to your passion.


Thoughts become things. Live with the truth that a thought created once has power, but a thought created repeatedly has awesome power. What was once a thought can soon be tangible. You are raw energy bursting with the ability to create!  Pele is that driving force, that need to create, that deep desire to move, to live, to inspire.  And the destructive force that Pele brings can be in a cleansing of old ways to make room for the new.  It's all in your attitude.  The world is waiting for the next great concept, performance, innovation, miracle drug, discovery, novel, art work, design, theory.....courtesy of you!